Things you rarely hear in Church

1 It's my turn to sit in the front pew. 5 Since we're all here, let's start the service early
2 I was so enthralled, I never noticed your sermon went 25 minutes over time. 6 Vicar, we'd like to send you to this Bible seminar in the Bahamas
3 Personally, I find witnessing more enjoyable than golf. 7 Nothing inspires me and strengthens my commitment like a stewardship campaign!
4 I love it when we sing hymns I've never heard of before! 8 Why can't we sing more psalms?

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